…you can ask me whatever you like – I have no secrets but today I am mostly answering some questions about surfing that have been left for me.
The first from the venerable Daddy Papersurfer is regarding search engines.
When surfing, what, in your opinion is the best search engine?
Well for myself I tend to use a 3 litre turbo diesel. It sends my 4×4 Toyota Hilux down the roughest of terrain when searching for surf. Obviously the 2.4 would suffice but the extra few pounds of torque get you through particularly tight spots…
The second and third are from the great Kevin Dixie himself – well known website coagulator and all round semi French person.
I’d like to know if you can surf with out a t-shirt. I say surf, I mean bellyboard, me and my son get rashes.
Well – it’s fairly obvious that both you and your son are suffering from a common ailment which is simply an acute allergy to the lower form of wave riding known commonly as sponging. If you make the evolutionary leap to stand up surfing you’ll find that the condition will clear itself up almost instantly. You could also try waxing the bush off your chest – it won’t help the rash but the pain will take your mind off it for a while…
And lastly…
When the sea is really “rough” ie big waves, how do the guys on surf boards take one second to get out beyond the breakers and me on foot takes about ten mins?
Well my gut instinct is to say that you’re a big girl’s blouse and you should go to the gym but that’s probably a little harsh. In reality the surfers often find rip currents to whip them out back that most people can’t even see. As the waves move in towards the shore it’s only the white or broken water that is actually pushing you backwards as the water underneath is simply moving up and down. So if you can dive under or scoot over the white water you will make much quicker progress. Or buy a jetski. Or simply watch from the beach with a large fruity cocktail in your hand.
If anyone has any other questions they wish me to answer then please leave them in the comments or the forum. They don’t have to be related to surfing – be wild and imaginative ask me anything about anything – I’ll make something up…
If you don’t I shall be forced to make up questions and that would be a bit like cheating…..
This report was brought to you by Penfold
Next week – ‘Ask Penfold anything again….’
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4 Comments
You are a true guru. Of what I’m not sure. Thank you Penfold, I’ll get a big one as soon as I can persuade my children to give me some money.
Can Americans with attitude and little hair surf? I’m only asking for a friend.
“If you make the evolutionary leap to stand up surfing you’ll find that the condition will clear itself up almost instantly”
Ohlalalalala…no chance!
Who is going to win the Rugby World Cup as I want to put a tenner on it.